Today is the second day of the loving myself trial. A meaningful post I read today was Abundance in a World of Limited Resources by Steve Pavlina. I am learning more and more to appreciate the lessons from scarcity.

Today there were still some panic attacks, but the day went by more peacefully. A random sequence of FAQ questions crossed my mind. The FAQ questions and my answers are below.

Have you tried this before?

Yes when I first read Kamal’s book, Love yourself like your life depends on it.


Did it work for you then? Why or why not?

After I read the book, I was inspired and tried the affirmations for like ten minutes. Over the next few days at work I tried the meditation exercise sporadically. The practice then had no long lasting effect. My analogy is that the practice is like chanting a magic spell that lasts only for 0.5 secs. When you first repeat an affirmation, the effect lasts for half a second. Only after repeating the affirmation for an extended period of time does something like a magical barrier begin to build in your life.

Repeating the words “I love myself” does it sound very narcissistic?

I used to think the same way. Afterwards I came up with the following thought experiment. Imagine Narcissist was looking at himself by the water’s edge, just like in the Greek myth. When he looks into the water, instead of seeing a handsome face, he sees an ugly face, full of pimples, scars, and unbalanced features. If he is still able to say to his ugly reflection “I love myself” then the morale of the story would be very different. Narcissist would become like a Saint, sending unconditional love to all, attracting animals like Snow White, helping old ladies cross the road and healing the sick.

This though experiment reveals a key truth. For Narcissistic people, what they are repeating to themselves is “I love myself BECAUSE I am handsome/beautiful/rich/smart/successful” ! It is very conditional love. For the practice of loving yourself, the sentence is “I love myself.” Notice the fullstop inside. There is no attached conditions. You having a good day, “I love myself.” You having a bad day, it is still “I love myself.” Rain or sunshine, you are giving yourself unconditional love, even if it is for a second.

Is there a better analogy to help me understand what may be happening?

Saying the affirmation one time is like having one second of sunshine. We have a seed planted in our hearts. It needs regular and consistent sunshine for the seed to germinate and grow. If we do the affirmation for one day and stop or do it for one week and stop. The seed will fail to germinate. If we do it for a whole, the seed germinates into a seedling and then we stop, the seedling dies before it can bloom into a flower. Yet we also do not need to do it non stop every second. As long as we do it regularly enough, the seed will germinate and the seedling will survive. How long can we go with a break in the practice, this is where the analogy breaks down.