It is like what Dr Dyer asks, “What comes out when live squeezes you? If you are an orange, only orange juice will come out, not apple juice or grape juice.

When life squeezes you, if fear or anger comes out, it means that inside you is fear or anger. When life squeezes you, if love or peace comes out, it means that you are full of love or peace inside.

This shows how to deal with fear. Dotseng mentioned this in his post “Love & Fear”. To kill fear, we need to first learn to love ourselves.

So to banish fear COMPLETELY, we must first realize, we can NEVER simply discard it away like so many of our bad habits. This is not how one should go abt the business of killing fear, as that only heightens fear it’self. To kill fear dead in it’s tracks – we need to first learn to love ourselves, we need to be kind to ourselves to even be selfish and bask in our full glory along with learning how to be perfectly comfortable with our imperfections. It is only when we dedicate ourselves to doing this time and again that we can overcome fear. As our love inside us will work it’s way outwards like a tree fingering from a seed. And it is only when this happens can we begin to chase our fear in ourselves, loved one’s and those who we really care about. As the fastest way to banish fear is NEVER to fight it head on, but to starve it of all nutrients with the power of love. Love conquers all. Love will always find a way.

Let’s say we are full of fear like a glass full of sour orange juice.  We want to stop feeling fear and want to fill ourselves full of love, like a glass of sweet apple juice. There are two ways.

The first way is to pour away the sour orange juice. This is the method of releasing emotions by letting go/feeling the emotions fully. This can be best learnt in the book Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender by David R. Hawkins (amazon non-affiliate link). After you pour away the sour orange juice of fear, you still need to learn to fill the glass with the sweet apple juice of love. This way is faster as we do not need time . This way is also more difficult as we tend to run away from our negative emotions and it is not easy for us to face our negative emotions head on. It is difficult to stop ourselves from trying to do anything to force the fear out, which Dotseng also says is futile.

The second way is to slowly pour sweet apple juice into the glass. The apple juice will mix with the orange juice and overflow. When we do it long enough, the apple juice will replace the orange juice in the glass. This way is the way of learning to love yourself. One of the best books on this subject is Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It by Kamal Ravikant (amazon non-affiliate link).

The second way is slower. Yet it is also gentler and easier to do. It is hard for us to face fear head on without trying to suppress it or push it away. It is easy for us to take baby steps to learn to love ourselves.

There are many different exercises/paths to loving yourself. The simplest practices is to say the affirmation “I love myself,” quietly in your mind. This is an practice. You can say this nonstop throughout the day. Don’t expect the affirmation to take immediate effect after saying it one stop. You can repeat the affirmation non stop throughout the day, even when you are doing about your daily tasks of work and living. This is a practice that can be done for the rest of your life. Like going to the gym, doing this practice faithfully, you may see results in maybe six months or as short as one month.

Study and research this well.

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